Your morals and values on certain political, religious, or societal issues make you who you are, and are things you will most likely not change your mind about. Having conversations with someone who disagrees with those topics may cause many complications. Even though the person you’re dating is a good person on the inside, know what your dealbreakers are. Having different beliefs and opinions on the big things can cause major complications down the road.
Your personality is what makes you, you. Maybe you are really silly and enjoy cracking jokes. But it’s not fun if your partner is the opposite, and is someone who takes everything seriously. Of course your personalities don’t have to be exactly the same, but being on opposite ends of the spectrum can cause problems to arise. If that happens, you may even feel bad about yourself and start to think you need to change. No one should ever make you feel that way, because you are amazing! It will be easier and you have a more successful relationship with someone who has a similar personality to yours, or at least someone who appreciates your differences and doesn’t try to change you or your behavior.
Plans for the Future
Plans for the future are very important to think about when in a relationship. These plans can either be personal and professional, and you should know what your goals are before you commit to someone else. Future plans may include educational and professional goals (such as grad school, or devoting extra-time to developing your career). If you’re further along in your relationship, these discussions may also hit on things like plans for where you want to live, owning a home, marriage and children. Having plans for the future regarding each other is key as well. How do your future plans complement or conflict with each other? For a relationship to be successful in the long term, being on the same page is crucial.
Spending Time Together
It’s important to prioritize spending time with each other. Talking on the phone and texting is great to help with the communication aspect of the relationship, but spending time together will allow you to get know your significant other on a deeper level. Focusing on quality time together will let that person not only get comfortable around you, but allow them to open up to you about secrets, aspirations, and even their true self. This opens your relationship to loving them from the inside out.
It doesn’t matter if your significant other’s parents are divorced and yours are still married. The problem comes when one of you is all about family and the other is not. If you like spending time with your family, it might be an uncomfortable situation if you invite your partner. He/she may get jealous when you choose your family over them, or may feel like their privacy is being violated if you like to share all the details with one of your parents or siblings. It will be way easier as your relationship progresses if both you and your partner have a similar expectation of what role family plays in your life.
It may cause problems if you keep to yourself most of the time but your partner is very outgoing. He/she might like going out almost every night, while you would rather stay in and do something together. This may cause arguments now or in the future. You will get along better and have a healthier relationship with someone who is on a similar social level as you are.
This might be a weird topic to think about, but if you expect something from your girlfriend or boyfriend and don’t receive it, it can be very frustrating. If you expect your boyfriend to spend less time playing video games and more time with you, but it doesn’t happen, then that’s something important to talk about. This might not be the most fun conversation to have, but it is definitely important for the both of you. This goes both ways. You will each have expectations of your partner, and for your relationship to be successful, expectations must be communicated.
It’s important to have at least one hobby or interest in common so that you can spend time together doing something you both love. Figure out what you each like to do, or maybe you can agree to try something new together! Some examples are working out, running, biking, crafts, reading, learning a new language, or cooking. You will appreciate and enjoy the quality bonding time you spend together.