15 of the Goofiest College Mascots in the Country
The Fighting Okra
This mascot for Delta State is exactly what you think it is, a pugnacious piece of okra.
Fighting Pickle
Seems like Delta State and University of North Carolina School of the Arts were on a similar wavelength when choosing their mascots. I have a mighty need to see these two schools (and their mascots) duke it out in some sort of sports arena now.
Artie the Artichoke
This mascot could easily be mistaken for a head of lettuce, but that would be doing Scottsdale Community College an injustice. Its students have much more heart than that.
Kernel Cobb
You think you’ve seen it all until you see an angry corn cob wearing a football Jersey. We have Concordia College to think for this imaginative genius. Or, should I say, Concornia College.
Stanford Tree
Yes, this is the mascot for Stanford University, and, yes, it is a giant tree with a cartoon face on it.
The Blue Blob
Xavier University got real creative with this one. The Blue Blob looks like the offspring of a Muppet and Cousin It, and he also looks just as suitable for TV. He’s kind of adorable, actually, and I imagine the kids love him.
Big Red
Western Kentucky University has a mascot that looks like The Blue Blob’s older cousin, only red.
Keggy the Keg
Somehow I’m not surprised the students of Dartmouth came up with an anthropomorphic beer keg as their mascot. It was bound to happen at some point.
Scrotie
Yes, this mascot is exactly what you think it is. No, I will not go into any more detail. You do you, Rhode Island School of Design.
Speedy the Geoduck
This mascot for Evergreen State College isn’t that weird if you know anything about geoducks. Except no one does. I still don’t know what a geoduck is. Whatever it is, it doesn’t look speedy.
Mortimer McPestle
I wouldn’t expect a mascot for St. Louis College of Pharmacy to be named anything else. That being said, I don’t even know how to start describing Morty’s appearance. Imagine a smug yellow werewolf in a lab coat. Yeah.
The Boilermaker Special
What’s a boilermaker, you may ask? Apparently it’s a person who makes boilers. Shocking. Why would Purdue students want “Boilermakers” as their title? Perhaps it has something to do with the word’s second definition: a shot of whiskey chased by a shot of beer. How do either of these definitions manifest themselves into Purdue’s mascot? They don’t! The Boilermaker Special is a train. Not a person dressed up as a train. Just a literal train.
Johnny Poet
Whittier College’s mascot, a giant purple man with a giant purple pen, is the definition of brains and brawn.
The Battling Bishop
You might think this mascot for Ohio Wesleyan University is a chess piece. Nope. It’s a human bishop. And he looks ready to rumble.
The Gorlok
Part cheetah, part dog, and part buffalo, this imaginary yellow creature from the minds of Webster University students is a monster I’m glad doesn’t exist in real life.